I was compelled to blog after having a conversation with one of my best friends about disappointment. Isn’t love the best, and at the same time the worst? It’s the best for obvious reasons like: butterflies when you hold hands, sweet kisses, long stares, voicemails, flowers, weekend getaways, and companionship. Unfortunately, it can also be the worst. The worst pain I’ve ever felt was because of love. Disappointment is probably the worst thing about love.
When you love someone you have an expectation (both subconscious and conscious), when an expectation isn’t met disappointment occurs. Being disappointed is difficult and often leads to insecurity. For me, insecurity is the worst emotion. I hate feeling insecure; I think everyone does. Since we all have expectations of our loved ones (and these expectations are rarely verbalized) we all experience disappointment and insecurity. Handling disappointment and insecurity maturely is one of the lessons I’m trying to learn.
When I’m disappointment in one of my relationships instead of jumping to the conclusion that it must be me or they must not care for me like I thought they did, I want to learn to accept where the person is coming from. I truly believe everyone has good in them and when you love someone you don’t want to disappoint them. People are where they are and when you truly love someone you have to be willing to meet them where they are. No, not willing, you have to want to meet them where they are. Meeting someone where they are and loving them the good, the bad, and the ugly is ultimately what everyone is looking for.
Handling disappointment is still something I am trying to get a handle on, but I know how to love, and if I know how to love then I am certain it will all work out for the best. Acceptance is a large part of love. If we can love, we can accept.
